The 1 thing your team expects from you

07 februari 2019

As a manager- you have so much on your plate. And that's just your own responsibilities.

Emails, meetings, projects, targets. Your attention is needed everywhere.

If you're anything like me, there are days when you feel like you should be a juggler, just to keep all the balls in the air.


And then there's - other people...

And their emotions. Sensitivities. Needs. 

Why do people make things so complex?

Can't they just be practical, logical?


There is one thing YOU can do to make other people easier to deal with.

Create safety. Psychological safety.


People need to know & trust that they can show up as who they are, without being judged.


And boy - are we quick to judge.

How often do we think things like: "How difficult can it be?" "Really?" "Don't you know that by now"?

Even when we don't say it - others feel the judgement that goes through our head.


So what is the alternative?

Consciously creating safety for the other. The space to have open, curious conversations.


How do you do that? Three steps to create safety:

  • Be intentional: our default brain-setting is a judging one. Decide that you want to be less judgmental. That you want the other person to feel safe with you. Remind yourself regularly (eg: set some reminders in your phone). Creating safety doesn't happen magically - we need to train our brain for it.

  • Show empathy. Empathy is a powerful antidote for our judgmental brain. It allows us to see, hear and understand the other person. The more we can emotionally understand the other person, the safer they feel with us. (BTW: no one has ever created safety by focusing on content only - you need to invest in the relationship in order to create safety)

  • Adopt a growth mindset: when people experience that you're not looking for perfection, that you believe that everyone can grow and evolve, they will relax. They will open up & share their challenges with you. Focus on lessons learned, don't play the blame game.



When people feel safe with you, relationship become so much easier.

You get a less drama, resistance & conflict.

Creating safety is the key to enjoying the people side of your job.


You've got this.

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